What Induces XTreme TRUMPology?

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Photo by Scott Olson/Getty

Look, XTreme TRUMPology is a way of life, a certain uncanny belief in the suspension of disbelief, a seething anger that brews from some dark subterranean world deep within, a place we didn’t even know existed, which manifests its way back out into the light of day uncontrollably, irresistibly. So you might be asking: what exactly induces the anti-philosophy that is XTreme TRUMPology? Where could this feverish ideology possibly be emanating from? What could possibly cause an individual to willingly, even passionately, embrace XTreme TRUMPology in its extravagant, even inspired rejection of reality?

You see, those who have given themselves up to manic flights of XTreme TRUMPology are apparently numb to its contradictions. Why else would they look to a playboy billionaire to solve their economic nightmare? How in the world could anyone believe that a hawker of shady real estate transactions, who has lined his pockets in gold, is going to negotiate incredible trade deals for America? And how is it even imaginable that a self-aggrandizing reality tv prima donna whose mantra is “your fired,” will create jobs for working class schmucks? Yes, XTreme TRUMPology is a world view unmoored from reality, it is a way of thinking well beyond the imaginary and the real, XTreme TRUMPology is in effect, post reality. XTreme TRUMPology is nothing short of a collective, participatory, unscripted mob performance, made-for-television, an amazing, not-to-be-missed golden opportunity for everyone to get into the Act.

But the real question here is what exactly induces XTreme TRUMPology, what leads to its symptoms, and why is it that millions of unsuspecting TRUMPologists have succumbed to its paralyzing effects? First, there is the source of TRUMPology, TRUMP himself. No matter how far and wide he travels from the truth, TRUMP speaks with absolute, certain authenticity. This is a magnificent skill, generally mastered by demagogues without a moral compass, who are free from the burden of compassion for fellow, pathetic human beings. Secondly, TRUMP moves very quickly, his attention span is unbelievably short, his capacity for thoughtfulness so incredibly shallow, that his mind can leap like a leopard from one piece of disinformation to the next at the speed of light, a virtuosic feat of absolute grandiosity when delivered with such supremely seductive self-confidence. A sight to behold.

Now you need to understand that typical TRUMP fanatics, the really XTreme ones, are made up of the “poorly educated,” as TRUMP himself describes them. These XTreme TRUMPologists are lacking in a certain, shall we say, gift of reason we might describe as “criticality,” a human trait that serves to act as a kind of shield to filter the toxins of raving demagoguery. Without this rather crucial protection, ingesting the TRUMP message essentially overheats the nervous system, causes blindness to rationality, and induces rabid states of hostility against anyone who is mired in the complexities of logical thinking.

But watch out: no one is outside of the sphere of influence of XTreme TRUMPology. You see, TRUMP is merely mimicking, amplifying, and redirecting the jolts and abrupt shifts that define our daily media intake of popular culture and social media. TRUMP is simply a big, orange, open faucet for the FLOW, without a valve, accelerating its seduction and magnifying its dangers of overdose, a FLOW now moving at such a ferocious speed it can crush anyone’s ability to differentiate between the real and the imaginary.

So beware, when the fountain of XTreme TRUMPology reaches its zenith, finds let us say, a certain critical mass, it cannot be turned off.